


tender kiss

by orphan_account



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Cuddling, Deepthroating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, M/M, Post Season 7, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2018-09-17
Packaged: 2019-07-13 13:35:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16019000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Keith wasn’t sure when he started feeling the heaviness in his chest and he didn’t know why he felt so weak and scared, but the least he expected was to cry in front of Shiro who was on his knees for him.





	tender kiss

**Author's Note:**

> not a porn fic sadly and I have no excuse as of why I made Keith cry when he gets his dick sucked lmao and first sheith/voltron fic, I hope I don’t fail too much orz. Also I’m sorry for the mistakes inside, if they frustrate you, tell me where they are so that I can edit them. This being said whoever gives this mess a try, you’re the best! Thank you so much!

Keith couldn’t say what was wrong with him because he had never felt this way. He knew one thing though, he was happy and in love. He knew that he could have a strong body next to his, warm and loving so he was happy. Shiro was fine, he was the captain, he had many responsibilities and many risks following him around but Keith was the same and he was aware that his protectiveness could go until some point. They had spoken about it, despite Keith dislike of the topic.

 

He didn’t want to think how he could be one second too late and he wouldn’t have been able to kill Sendak or how he could still feel the way Shiro’s clone was ready to kill them both and Keith so close to losing Shiro. These things couldn’t happen again, not now, not when he could feel Shiro so much closer now, to kiss him and love him and call him his. Before Keith didn’t have this relationship, he was only the best friend, the one who loved Shiro with everything but now they were so much more and it was a scary thought.

 

Losing Shiro was scary, losing Shiro right in front of his own eyes was devastating. Atlas was a good big girl as Shiro liked to call her. Atlas and Shiro were a good team, perfect and strong but Keith was feeling as if he was choking every time Atlas got too close to the fires and the enemies’ ships. He knew Shiro could handle himself, he knew he was strong but Keith couldn’t help it. Shiro was the same as he was, if not even more stubborn. If Shiro thought his life was worth the risk, he’d do it and Keith was selfish to think that he’d make sure to prevent it.

 

Every mission further from each other was a nightmare for Keith. They spoke, there was a needed communication, after all, the missions were connected. They had to speak and check on each other. Sometimes Lance reminded him that Keith was a leader of Voltron before Shiro’s boyfriend and Keith couldn’t help but agree.

 

Emotions could be blinding and Keith was aware of that even when Allura was reassuring him that this was okay and it was understanding. But Keith had no excuses how much he was trembling every time when Shiro wasn’t responding to him. Sometimes he wondered if Shiro was feeling the same way. How strong the relief was when he heard Shiro’s voice, it felt as if he was taking the cleanest mountain air all over again.

 

“Welcome back, Captain,” Keith would greet because otherwise, he had to tell him how much he loved him and how much he scared him. However, he knew no one needed to listen to him being weak.

 

“You did a great job out there, Voltron, let’s get us back home now,” Shiro would reply with the obvious smile on his face and the tiredness inside his tone. It was a long day after all.

 

If Keith put some of his attention on himself at least a little bit, maybe he would have noticed the amount of suppressed feelings growing inside him the moment he woke up in the hospital with Krolia and Kolivan next to him, smiling at him, and Shiro on the big screen in front of his bed, giving his speech as the leader he was.

 

If only Keith noticed that he was keeping too many feelings, thoughts, fears inside himself and if he had shared them with Shiro - the man he loved for so long but only recently had the guts to approach him romantically and ask for something more, something he craved for so long -, if Keith did something about it, then maybe he wouldn’t be in the current situation.

 

He and Shiro had mutually decided to go slow, to teach each other what they liked and what they wanted because they were best friends for so long and they were close but they had never been this close. Although Shiro was fast to agree when Keith suggested it, still a little drugged from the painkillers and a little dizzy because Shiro was so damn pretty when he came right after taking a shower and putting on casual clothes to spend his evening with Keith.

 

Keith wanted to call this man his and he spoke up. Even in his wildest dreams, he didn’t think that Shiro would lean over him, kiss his forehead and say yes.

 

“I need some time though,” Shiro had spoken quietly. “I love you, Keith, I really do but I need a little time.”

 

The reason behind him was left unspoken and Keith knew what it was. Adam, the loss of the man who was once owning Shiro’s heart. Adam was a good man, he was strong, determined and a really good pilot, he was a good man despite everything. Keith knew why Shiro loved him, Adam was someone who could keep Shiro grounded, motivated and supporting him, at least for a while. Keith didn’t know the story fully, but he knew that when Shiro left on Kerberos Adam wasn’t there.

 

Keith didn’t need the story to know that the things didn’t work out as both of them thought or wanted to. Adam had never changed his way of speaking with Keith, although they barely saw each other once Shiro went away and Keith was only for a while in the Garrison dorms. However, Keith knew that Shiro needed time to mourn, to accept that Adam was gone and that he was only recently gone, if Shiro had come earlier, if Voltron came earlier, then maybe they could have seen each other. But it was too late and too many things had changed.

 

Keith knew Shiro loved him, despite the teasing of how they were brothers and the unsaid things about their fight, Keith’s fight with Shiro’s clone, Keith could see the love and the trust behind Shiro’s action even when they barely spoke about it but Keith let himself see and accept. The love and the trust and the desire were there for a longer time than Keith thought.

 

Surprisingly he didn’t regret that he acted on his own feelings only now. Maybe it was because of how close Keith was to die when the Black lion crashed on the ground, the pain Keith felt before and after even when he could see nothing, he thought it was his end. He promised himself that he’d confessed and he did.

 

Since then their relationship consisted more of hand-holding and small kisses here and there. They needed months to do something more - once they were ready their hands were needy, their bodies burning and Keith had never thought that Shiro could arch his back so prettily under his palms.

 

Sometimes Keith noticed the difference between them. Despite everything, Shiro was so sure in his touches and his desires and even if Keith had his own experience with a few Blade members and some humans when he was still a horny teenager on earth, when it came to Shiro, Keith’s hands were shaking, sweating and slipping when he tried to grab Shiro. It wasn’t bad, they were both laughing, Shiro was pulling Keith closer, kissing him and telling him that it was okay, he was fine, he loved him.

 

But this and many more were the reasons for Keith to simply blow up in the worst time.

 

Sometimes after a mission, when they were further from each other and had risked too much Shiro would grab Keith’s hand and pull him towards his room. There they’d kiss with more teeth than tongue and touch as if they were starving. These times they were more tired than usual and most of the time it ended with stinging bites on their lips and necks, with messy handjobs that would leave them burning or one of them were falling on their knees for the other. Most of the time it was Shiro.

 

Once Keith thought that Shiro would feel awkward to do it for him, but he was so wrong. Shiro loved falling down on his knees for Keith, he loved kissing and biting and licking Keith’s tip and thighs and his underside and sucking his balls as if he was the tastiest thing Shiro had. Keith would always be amazed at how much and how easily Shiro could take him in.

 

It was probably something quite stupid to be fascinated by how easily your boyfriend could open his mouth and take you all the way to the base without choking and even to look smug while doing it, but Keith was feeling this way. He was feeling like this for everything which Shiro was doing with him. It was from the smallest thing, at first Keith was counting the times they kissed until he lost the count or how many different smiles Shiro had for him, to the way how his new altean hand was just as warm as his human one and how both were securing Keith by his side.

 

And now when Shiro had pushed Keith on the bed to sit down while smiling at him with the cute soft smile making his grey eyes to shine and his fluffy hair to look even softer, Keith couldn’t help but run his fingers through Shiro’s hair and pulling a little. His eyes were on Shiro as if one blink would take him away and Keith was trembling under Shiro’s touch, even when it wasn’t their first time and it surely wasn’t going to be their last. Keith knew it was bad when even Shiro noticed it.

 

“Calm down, baby, we can enjoy this,” Shiro whispered against Keith’s inner thigh and squeezed both of them before pulling down his pants and his boxers. Keith groaned and hissed when Shiro kept on kissing and chuckling against his skin. “Calm down.”

 

“I’m trying but it isn’t easy,” it wasn’t easy because Keith was feeling something and he couldn’t explain what it was.

 

All he knew was that he wanted this, he whined when Shiro spread his legs even more and moved between them but he wasn’t touching him. He hissed when Shiro’s right hand was on his thigh and his left hand touching his base and then the whiny needy moan that left his mouth when Shiro kissed his tip and sucked it.

 

Keith knew he was a goner. He knew Shiro loved it when his hands were on his head and push him down on him so that he’d go deeper, Keith knew that Shiro liked it when Keith was telling him he was good or was choking on his own words when Shiro sucked him off as if his life depended on it. They loved doing this, Shiro would come untouched simply from the fact that Keith was a wreck under him and his mouth and Keith wouldn’t be able to shut up about how much he loved it, but now, this time, it was different.

 

It probably was because Shiro had left Atlas once again to try to reach one of the Garla ships, maybe it was because Keith could still see the scratch on Shiro’s neck from the other day when they were training and it wasn’t healed yet. It could have been the way Shiro had hissed early today before the meeting with Krolia and Kolivan and Keith noticed how tired Shiro looked. And it was most probably because Keith had been close to losing and actually losing Shiro for too many times and everything was boiling inside him until he couldn’t hold it back.

 

The first hiccup came when Keith’s tip touched the back of Shiro’s throat and the latter hummed against him. The second hiccup was when Shiro pulled back his upper teeth lightly touching Keith’s skin just as he liked it and the third one that actually made Shiro realize that something was wrong was when he wrapped his lips around Keith’s head and his left hand moved down to the base. It was then when Keith knew this hiccup would be too much as a choked sob and he moved his hands away from Shiro’s hair and put them over his mouth.

 

His vision was blurry from the tears in his eyes that he didn’t blink because he was scared of letting them fall down. He couldn’t see what Shiro’s expression was and he wasn’t sure what Shiro was seeing but the hiccup, the sob came out and Shiro let him go a moment later and cupped his face.

 

“Keith? Keith, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” Keith wanted to smile and chuckle, to tell him that everything was okay but he couldn’t do anything but cry and he felt pathetic because he could hear how broken his cries sounded and how much he was shaking. He didn’t miss how worried Shiro looked while calling his name, trying to make sure Keith was okay.

 

The problem was that Keith couldn’t speak, between taking enough air in so that he wouldn’t pass out and let out the painful cries out, Keith knew he was making Shiro sick worried but his emotions were so strong. He could recognize them: fear, anger and love, so much love. He was scared of losing Shiro again and the fear of losing him for real with no more chances. Anger because he was angry at himself of constantly trying to be everywhere and do everything right but still knowing that he could be late with one second and everything would be over. Anger because although he was choosing Shiro above everyone and everything else, he knew that maybe one day he had to choose between the existence of everyone (human and alien) and Shiro and then Keith knew he’d have to choose only one. He feared that he might not be able to choose.

 

And now, simply because he felt it - what it meant to be on verge of dying -, and knowing that Shiro had felt it probably more times than Keith wished to count, everything was falling over him. No matter how ridiculous he might seem and how he was making Shiro almost shout at him and shake him, Keith couldn’t help but pull Shiro closer to him, wrapping his arms and legs around him while hiding his face in Shiro’s neck and crying.

 

He couldn’t allow Shiro to leave him alone and go look for someone when all Keith needed was Shiro. Keith needed to take only a few more breaths and he was going to calm enough to speak and reassure that he was okay, there was nothing wrong.

 

This was going to be a lie, though, there was nothing right either.

 

Since Keith’s ears were buzzing he couldn’t hear clearly what Shiro was saying but he could feel the gentle vibration on his chest coming from Shiro’s when he was speaking. He seemed calm, calmer than Keith at least. He was probably telling things that could calm down Keith and maybe use his deep soothing voice in order to keep him in check. And somewhere in between his hiccups and his need to squeeze Shiro closer, Keith noticed that he still had his dick out and he was crying like a baby while Shiro was probably still feeling him in his mouth. Keith couldn’t help but giggle and nuzzle into Shiro’s neck.

 

He didn’t miss how Shiro tensed next to him and Keith chuckled louder between his hiccups and moved to kiss Shiro’s neck. He knew he might seem crazy, laughing after crying and panicking but he loved how patient Shiro was with him.

 

“Do you want to talk about it? Or we should get in bed,” Shiro asked quietly, awfully gently and Keith shook his head.

 

“I’m scared of losing you,” Keith confessed. He knew it would sound strange, they were together, alive, content and healthy enough to fuck but somehow while Shiro was down and sucking him off, Keith thought how easily everything could be over, one blink and bam it was gone - he couldn’t imagine another time losing Shiro.

 

“I’m here, I’m always going to be here, Keith,” Shiro moved to kiss Keith’s temple.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

“Hey, I get scared when you’re out there too. Sometimes I feel like screaming into the void because I’m worried one day I won’t hear your voice again,” Keith’s breath hitched then and Shiro laughed. “Sometimes, when you’re sleeping deeply I start to count all the scars I see on your body and often sigh with relief when I notice they didn’t grow in number.”

 

“Shiro…” Keith wanted to say that he felt the same and how everything could be even more overwhelming now when he possessed some kind of a claim over Shiro, his boyfriend, his lover. It was different now, still the same but a great deal of intimacy that Keith wasn’t used to.

 

“And sometimes when I see how much you’re willing to give of yourself to me and the risk you take for me, sometimes it’s scary how happy it makes me be but also makes me so scared for you because I know I don’t mind getting hurt but…”

 

Keith moved to shut him up, he was glad he wasn’t the only one feeling like this but he also realized he wasn’t ready to speak about it yet. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, he knew they had to speak about it, about how much they’d sacrifice for each other and how much they had to for the mission. Some day they would speak about it, and then when they were going to speak about it, Keith would be honest. He was going to share his worries, he was going to speak about his emotions and how hard it was to breathe sometimes and how he was too counting Shiro’s scars and bruises. How he was making sure Shiro would be always strong and healthy and alive before and after a mission but for now, he didn’t want to speak about it.

 

“My dick is still out,” Keith whispered against Shiro’s lips and both of them laughed. “I taste myself on you too, this is so embarrassing.”

 

“I love it,” Shiro whispered back and moved to kiss Keith deeper. Keith shivered when he felt Shiro’s hand ghosting over him. “I love it because I know I make you feel good and because I love having you. Also, you gave me a heart attack, so you better make it up to me.”

 

“Demanding,” Keith chuckled and moved away so that he could take off his pants and shirt. He was too soft and frowned but then he looked up at Shiro who was making sure their clothes wouldn’t get wrinkles and put them on one of the small chairs Keith had, smiling at him as if Keith was his whole universe.

 

“You’re so beautiful,” Keith said a little awed because Shiro with his soft hair, with the scar across his face with his deep grey eyes and the way he seemed so soft and pretty and lovely despite his size and his strength, he was so beautiful and Keith couldn’t help but hiccup again.

 

“Okay, I say we cuddle each other and call Kosmo for the free cuddles,” Shiro was worried again and he was still with his boxers on, Keith wordlessly nodded and put his own too. Too many emotions were never leading to anything good, Keith concluded and plopped down on his bed and growled.

 

“We could have so much good time together and I screwed it up,” Keith groaned and almost kicked his legs in the air as if he was a frustrated teen again. Shiro laughed, more like giggled and moved closer to Keith, wrapping his arms around Keith’s middle and kissing his bare shoulder.

 

“You didn’t and I don’t mind the cuddles,” Keith winced and Shiro snored. “More fun for me.” Shiro sighed dreamily and chuckled when Keith pinched his side. “What? I like it!”

 

“I like it too,” Keith whispered and moved to kiss Shiro again. “Next time it’s going to be really good.”

 

“We need to speak about this too eventually,” Shiro reminded gently. They had to or episodes as this one were going to happen often.

 

“We will,” Keith nuzzled closer to Shiro. “Let’s sleep?”

 

“No Kosmo?” Shiro teased and Keith growled.

 

“I want only you tonight,” Keith grumbled and bit Shiro’s chin before pulling him closer and kissed Shiro’s chest. “Don’t let me go.” _Just like I’ll never let you go_ stayed unsaid.

 

“Never.”

 

Keith closed his eyes and listened to Shiro’s heartbeat and his breathing, so he fell asleep like this. Feeling Shiro’s gentle kisses on the top of his head, his left hand moving up and down his spine, Shiro’s hum and shush at Kosmo who probably teleported sometime later, but Keith couldn’t even bother. He felt safe and calm. He also knew he owned this, he had his time, he had his love and for now, this was enough. Before he fell asleep even deeper, Keith made a promise to wake up Shiro with a lot of kissing and touching.


End file.
